I’ve been trying to figure out where and how to pick up this story again.  When God called me to tell my story, I didn’t want to do it. He wanted me to lead with confessing my sins and telling everyone about how He rescued me.  If there was ever a season when I didn’t want to pick up my cross, that was it.   I’ve come to the dreadful and oddly peaceful realization that persecution is part of the package.

Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.  Matthew 10:38

You should note that I said, “He wanted me to lead with confessing my sins and telling everyone about how He rescued me.”  

The truth is that I couldn’t defend myself.  The LORD himself defended me.  I’ve had to spend a lot of time with Him over the last year both in prayer and renewing my mind with His word.  I really like Jeremiah 20:11 and Matthew 5:4 in the Amplified version.

But the Lord is with me as a dread champion [one to be greatly feared]; Therefore my persecutors will stumble and not overcome [me]. They will be completely shamed, for they have not acted wisely and have failed [in their schemes]; Their eternal dishonor will never be forgotten.  Jeremiah 20:11

“Blessed [forgiven, refreshed by God’s grace] are those who mourn [over their sins and repent], for they will be comforted[when the burden of sin is lifted]. Matthew 5:4